Tonight a 3 month old baby died. We tried everything to bring her back but were unsuccessful. The Grandmother put the baby down for a nap and returned to check on the baby but found the baby face down and not breathing. Nate ( paramedic) did mouth to mouth CPR until the rest of the crew arrived. We called for Life Flight and we got the baby in to the back of the ambulance where the flight crew pronounced her dead. The mother and father were invited into the back of the ambulance. Once we disconnected the baby from our equipment I handed the baby to the mother who cuddled the baby into her chest and began to sob. I felt helpless and a sense of failure as a firefighter. Just then I pictured my own wife and daughter in this situation and I had to hold back my emotions while we tried to comfort the family. It was a bad night and the real crappy thing is we pack up and get ready for the next call, we don't get time to relax and deal with our emotions, we just get back on the truck and keep going, we get work through those emotions on our days off. It's a lot of fun for the wife and kids when firefighters come home quiet and a little depressed. So sorry Jamie, I'll be home in two days. Love you.